Random Goofs II

Sometimes we are overloaded with possible matches (yeah right!) and we must group them all together because we just do not have the time to comment on every loser that we come across. As 'Here's Why I'm Single' commented, "What were these guys thinking?" when they posted these photos. Gawd, give me a break! All we're asking for here is a guy that is decent looking, plays golf, has a job (and not behind a cash register) and thinks about what his photo might look like to potential dates! Gah!

Bachelor #1 is displaying his love for ketchup? His fun side and openness to dressing in costume? His work attire for the days he works in the grocery store handing out samples for Heinz? Don't know, he didn't explain in his profile so we can only imagine.

Bachelor #2 is showing us his landscaping abilities and has also thrown in a couple of rug rats for our amusement. Billy Bob Jr. & Ricky Bobby are lookin' for a new momma. Any takers?

Random goofs

OK, work with me here. If you are putting your picture up on an internet dating site, you are actually looking at the picture you are about to post, correct? You know how it's going to turn out, right? So are these guys blind? Punk'd? Serious? Suspended in mid-air?

Mabey, mabey not

Girls, tell me. Do any of y'all sit in front of your computer nekkid? And take pictures of your own self? Do you?

Here's the 411 on what this fella wants. I think "flee" markets is probably the correct spelling. some one that dont play head games like to be outdoors kids are ok and wants to mabey have kids depends on her i like to go to flee markets and go to garage sales in summertime dont get much time at home but like to enjoy it when i can

Glamour Puss

Did this guy really go to Glamour Shots for this special photo?? This is a guy that enjoys karaoke (I didn't know anybody really liked karaoke?), songwriting and poetry. This is what he is looking for in that special lady........(my) woman is a tall redhead with that maddening necklace of freckles that fall deep into the cleavage of her breasts. She has green eyes and a biting sense of humor. She is self-confident enough to enjoy her femininity and her spirit is one of adventure. It would be nice if she is college educated, but common sense is desired more than book smarts. Also, she REALLY needs to be tolerant. 5 foot nothin', petite little blondes are invited to apply also. The ideal woman is MY woman who is proud to call me HER man. Hmm, luckily I do not fit into either of these descriptions so I guess I will not be jumping on this. BTW, he says he has never been married......I would never have guessed that.

Is this the Alltel guy?

Wizard! Seriously. What prompts a guy to post a picture like this on a dating site?

There was no reference in his bio as to whether this is a Halloween costume, a birthday party mascot gig, an Arabian nights party outfit or just a casual Saturday at home. Think about it; would you want to be the girl who walks in the door to this?

. . . Or a date!

Got a new match from Plenty of Fish, the easy stepsister of online dating sites. His picture is too small to copy and paste here, but his headline is "NO! I don't have a job . . . Or a car!" To be fair, POF does ask if you have a car -- and if you can figure out why they ask that, more power to you. Hey, we live in Midwest. No car = no transpo = loser.

The 56-year-old non-working non-driver is actually retired, and says he thinks he may have retired too early because he now eats franks and beans. Says he's from the West Coast and was educated on the East Coast, but the killer quote from this bio is: "I just learned that the United States owns some islands. I want to go check them out." So I'm guessing that East Coast education wasn't at Harvard.

Golf in the Magic Kingdom

Just returned from Orlando and all things golf and Mickey. The PGA Show offers more cute golf guys per square foot than you can shake a SwingStick at. The weather gods of the Midwest always take this opportunity to jack with us -- it rained one day, and the next day it was actually warmer back home than it was in Orlando.

We had a chance to see lots of great fashion. Saw Ian Poulter in his Union Jack vest and excellent hair (and yeah, the guy who moderated the fashion show is wearing pink slacks). Ian's a guy who can wear just about anything, and the models for his men's line could, too -- skinny slacks, bright colors, wide belts, lots of gel and soul patches. Someone made a comment about his recent laser eye surgery, attributing the wild outfits he wears to an inability to see what he's wearing -- sour grapes. He looked hot.


Also snapped this photo of Boo Weekley, who debuted a line of camouflage golf clothes. Which you would need why, exactly? We thought it was all about looking good on the course, not blending in with the tree line, but then neither of us is partial to guys who chew, so what do we know? Boo was happy to have his picture taken, and actually turned around to do a little booty-shake dance for me after I got the mug shot. And he's got a lot of booty to shake.

Boo's new line is primarily men's but we did see a pink ladies' tech polo with camouflage inset panels down the sides. My question is, if you're wearing pink, how inconspicuous can you be?

We didn't get to see Tiger, of course, but we found out where he likes to eat. Most of the tour guys were in Scottsdale for the FBR Open. We saw Duffy Waldorf in the Gogie Girl booth, selling wine. Dennis DeYoung did a concert Wednesday night -- the guy's still got some pipes. The sponsor was Elations, a gluco/chondro joint drink. Would have been perfect with a shot of vodka, like a Red Bull cocktail for us boomers. More on the ladies in the next post.