Rhinestone Cowboy?

OK, the guy's first picture creeped me out because of the scary psycho eyes and the silver tips on his shirt collar, but everybody takes a bad picture at least once in their lives, even psychos. How would the Motor Vehicle Department stay in business if it weren't for all of us going back to try to improve that picture? (You all do that too, don't you?) The porn star mustache doesn't help, either.

But then I looked at the second picture.

Now, in addition to the hat, he's got a short-sleeve Sears Indian print sport shirt (and really -- a short-sleeve sport shirt? Who wears those?) PLUS we get the hat tip with the "Here's to you, ladies" salute. There also appears to be a wallpaper border of kitty cats, a chrome rack placed high enough on the wall to make me suspect the picture was taken in his bathroom, and a little, teeny, tiny dried animal skull on the wall. I'm thinking to myself "Oh my, what is the dealio here?" when up pops picture number three.

RUN, RUN, AS FAST AS YOU CAN! He's naked --except for the cowboy hat and a bow tie. Sweet Mother of God, what woman on earth would look twice at a man in this condition? Got to give him props for the omnipresent rakish tilt of the hat, though!